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Billy Kaunda’s Parley recall

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With Richard Chirombo:

It is so hot— the political temperature; so hot that, as someone put it the other day in another place far away from Lake Malawi, one almost expires.

What else, other than some hot political temperature, can make my Dear Mama Justice Jane Ansah fume at confused people who are posting ‘useless’ things on social media while Malawians are waiting for results of the May 21 elections.

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And, then, there are some ‘confused’ journalists, too; the type that wants Malawi Electoral Commission (Mec) officials to be “drinking” coffee with some politicians, instead of keeping Malawians updated on results of Tuesday’s presidential, parliamentary and Local Government elections. So ‘mischievous’ are such journalists that, just yesterday, like a primary school teacher addressing ‘kids’ that have just ‘graduated’ from kindergarten, Dear Mama had no choice but to chasten them.

Tiribe nthawi yomwa khofi ife!” Dear Mama said. Ha!Ha !Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!H a!Ha!Ha!

When Dear Mama opened her mouth, at a filled-to-capacity Comesa Hall on May 23, all I thought was: “Gosh, Dear Mama should not say, ‘You, naughty kids, do not attend my press briefings again’”. Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!H a!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!

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But she said the right words—Tiribe nthawi yomwa khofi ife!”— and I was like. “That’s better!”

Especially when the naughty ‘journalist’ were hushed into embarrassment.

I have recounted this story because, somehow, there is someone who has ‘recaptured’ his political scent: Billy Kaunda!

Billy run a quiet campaign, only to outsmart one veteran politician in parliamentary elections in Mzimba District.

Now, when Mec announces official results within the 23 days, as stipulated in electoral laws, Billy Kaunda’s name will be announced.

And Billy, perhaps forgetting that this is a political, and not artistic stage, may sing:

Ndakumverani mumandinena/

Ndakumverani mumandinyoza/

Kodi khalidwe lanu ndi lotani/

Kukonda kulimbana ndi amnzanu/

Koma ndiribe nanu mulandu/Ndiribe nanu chifukwa…

Mec officials, enjoying the music, will more likely than not delay abit and, then, tell him: “Stop it, Billy. This is not a stage for artists. This is for politicians.”

But, then, who can blame him? Billy is excited to be back to the house he once served. I am talking of the august House. Who knows, he may even become a Cabinet minister; full-time minister and not deputy minister, this time around.

Now, Billy, before you step on Parliament’s concrete floor, shout, for the last time in the next five years, ahoi!!!!

Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha! Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!

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