Cheating men are worse than dogs


With Tayanjah Phiri

Joe being Joe has sparked a very hot debate in the Crew. He has, of course, been added to the list of ‘the worst cheating men’ in the country, at least going by the assessment of the Crew.

He started well but ends up scoring highly on high level stupidity. Of course, others have come up with examples of other equally ‘stupid cheaters’ that do not even care about the lives of their spouses, which are women.


“Akulu akulu, kunali smoko kunyumbaku. Mwamwayi, sinaphulike zenizeni: You know what, that two weeks ago I went to Mangochi, I had strayed with some beautiful girl who tempted me to do the type of things we, men, do without protection. Two days after I came home, I noticed some changest,” starts Joe.

“When I went to the hospital, the doctor said it was a venereal disease. I was shocked. He gave me a lecture on how this was a risk to my life and that of my wife and he recommended that I come with her to the hospital for treatment I was prescribed – which was two injections and strong anti-biotics, guys, I did not know how to tell my wife,” he says.

Shaaaaa! Ndiye simokodi, zinatha bwanji?” Asks Happison.


“Wait until I finish boss, some of these things are too bad to be true! I thought I could not inform my wife because I found myself in that situation due to my carelessness,” adds Joe, being Joe.

He continues: “I had to think of a plan and, overnight, one came by. I told my wife that I had been to the hospital and the doctor had found that I had an infection related to excessive drinking of fresh milk. She agreed that it was important for us to go to the hospital.”

“And the doctor treated her and wrote a note to me, saying, ‘your wife has been treated from the milk disease, please, stop drinking the said unboiled milk, especially when you go out on field trips, and please see me immediately for a chat on how you can avoid contracting the disease again’; I was really psychologically dwarfed by his diplomacy,” continues Joe being Joe.

But members of the Crew have really gone mad at his irresponsible and careless act. First, they feel that act would have given room to HIV and Aids infection, more so to the innocent wife. Second, the cheating of the wife was tantamount to domestic violence.

Lackson chips in: “You know, that reminds me of my neighbour who also went to a field trip and realised that he had gonorrhoea. He phoned his wife, informing her that his bosses were inconsiderate and had decided to extend his field trip for another week. During which time, he was busy getting multiple treatment for the disease and the wife was very furious, thinking that the bosses were abusing her husband.”

“Please, stop that nonsense. I think it is time cheating men realised that they are worse than dogs!” Happison curtails the debate.

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