Children are not trophies
The foundation of everything is important. All the great buildings start with a great foundation and back-breaking labour.
The first brick, the first shovel of sand, the first paste of cement all lead to a great building. The foundation of a human being is equally important.
I have come to notice a trend nowadays where children are taken as trophies.
A trophy is something of a decorative award that is usually left on the shelf and sometimes shined here and there so as to remind people what you are capable of achieving. For most, this is how children are taken as well, as trophies.
What we see nowadays is children born in a family and shown off to friends and family; topped with the prevalence of social media we see a baby’s pictures pos ted on the internet within a day or two of birth.
What comes next is more showing off about how beautiful the baby is, how nicely the baby dresses, places the baby has been taken to, how much the baby is spoilt by the loving parents and the works.
As the child grows we see more and more of the child being glorified and praised and worshipped.
The child’s little achievements are amplified but unacceptable behaviour by the child is swept under the rug, and not directly dealt with by most. Implications of treating the child like one not capable of wrong but a perfect being are grossly underestimated.
For some this is just part of the game, in the background they are doing the real parental duties and raising their children closely and with discipline.
They are proud of their children and happy to have them but also keep in mind that children are a great and taxing responsibility and therefore execute the necessary duties and steps in raising children.
For others, it remains a trophy affair. Their children are simply trophies to be shown off, shinned here and there, spoilt and placed on the family shelf. This is quite a common trend in the modern generation.
The trophy syndrome is everywhere, not limited to financial standing as most would like to believe that it is usually the rich who spoil their children.
The thing is spoiling is not only limited to material provisions but the attitude the children are raised up with. Whether a parent is rich or poor, it is the parents attitude that influences the way they relate with the child and whether they spoil the children or not.
Some actually believe letting their children lead a spoilt and free-flowing life symbolises the love they have for their children and that this in turn makes them great parents.
Truth of the matter is I am yet to see a child who has been raised in such a way end up being a responsible adult. Most children that have been raised as trophies end up being a nuisance to many.
There is a lot that stems from upbringing. The roles parents and guardians play as they are raising a child especially in the first two decades of a child’s life goes a long way in shaping the person the child is going to become in future and how this child is going to interact with other people.
It is not right to let a child grow without strict guidance and discipline in the name of love and adoration. A child is a human being not an angel or a divine being that has some unknown powers giving him or her an invincible passage in life.
Just like any human being, there are certain codes of conduct and principles that have to be the base of any individual’s livelihood.
The other thing is, a child will not forever live and associate with his or her parents and immediate family.
Children will associate with so many other people in their lives and the older they grow the more responsible and independently intelligent they need to become in these associations. This is a fact others forget.
A child’s life is not limited to the conditions you set for them and the behaviours you allow.
Children have to be raised in a way that equips them for life outside the immediate family, equips them to handle themselves diligently in different environments and situations and also equips them to be responsible adults when they eventually leave the house to stay alone or stay with other people.
I rest my case.
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