Fredokiss the chauffeur


They say time comes when patient youths, hopeful workers and devout believers in human reason harvest happiness.

It does not matter how long it takes but such time comes.

Success, they also say, tastes sweeter when it comes at the end of disappointment, making it [success] sweeter than painful memories.


Yes, bad memories, like an unwelcome load, can be set aside so that the mind can pour itself out in the blessings of the world.

Now, if ever there was someone who is singing this song, a song of happiness when painful memories have been laid down, that someone must be Fredokiss.

A couple of weeks ago, Fredokiss and Tchwe mwana tchwe – I am talking of flamboyant politician Kamlepo Kalua, who happens to be Fredokiss’s adorable dad— went down the memory lane. Literally.


I mean, according to Fredokiss, the papa took him to one church in Blantyre where, reportedly, a then homeless Tchwe mwana tchwee used to sleep outside one of the halls. I am talking of one of the halls the church owns. Tchwe mwana tchwe, it is said, used to sleep there at night— no blanket, no comfort, whatsoever.

But things change. Tchwe mwana tchwe now swims in riches. He swims in the waters of fame. He swims in the waters of honour. Bravo Honourable Kamlepo Kalua, Member of Parliament!

Which brings me to the story of Fredokiss himself. It seems that Fredokiss has always loved company. Come to think of it, even at birth, he was not born alone.

He was born with a twin sister!

Hey, wait a minute. Maybe I am jumping the gun. If Fredokiss loves company, how come he is not married? Ha!H a!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!H a!Ha!Ha!

Whatever the case. At least, at the time he was born, he was in good company.

And, this month, he was in good company. Again.

I mean, the twin sister married!

And Fredokiss, of all people, was the chauffeur.

He wrote, in his own handwriting: “[I] was the driver for my Twin Sista on her wedding…Congratulations Ronald and Hilda!”

Well, Fredokiss-The- Chauffeur, when will we say the same thing to you? I am giving you 14 days to answer; otherwise, I will search for a would-be-wife on your behalf. Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha! Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!

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