What you are, matters


Often we miss to realise dreams, we wander through the wrong path and we get disillusioned and finally give up. The bottom line is very simple; we crowd our minds with searching for a dream that is not our dream. We bend other people’s dreams and try to live by them, to conform it to what we think. As long as we live by such a principle, our dreams will always elude us.

Our dream is not through what people say about us. Our dream is what we feel burning within our soul, that which we do with ease and give us a sense of fulfillment. We deviate away from it and try to make the dream of others into ours because we possibly have seen how their dreams have changed their lives. That is a mark of failure in our thinking. Our dreams can change things and become the aspiration of many others.

Nick Vujicic did not mind that he had no arms and legs. He realised that he had a greater talent and gift that did not rely on arms and legs. He was good at speaking and no wonder he is one of the world’s most sought-after speaker and lives a comfortable life more than billions able-bodied people. His life has been giving hope to countless people that were born with arms and legs. In the words of Les Brown, “never let the opinions of others become your reality”.


The 1980s and 1990s Malawi music icons like Michael Mukhito (Micheal Yekha) and Allan Namoko were blind but their blindness did not suppress their music talent. They realised that music had nothing to do with eyes. Michael Yekha was a big amazing figure as he could string a guitar and beat the drum at the very same time. If he had tried to live a dream that could have needed sight, he could have achieved nothing in life. He believed in what he had. It was his belief in his music ability that mattered most.

When Gabadinho Mhango failed the Junior Certificate of Education examinations, it was a big hit. We gave him many belittling names. But education was not his main strength. His power to influence was in his legs. He is one of Malawi’s few and exciting football exports. We watch him on TV. When he does not represent the country, we cry for him. Actually, he earns more than many top executives in Malawi. What Gabadinho is is what matters not the education that we would have loved him to pursue. We crafted our philosophies in Gabadinho but what made him move forward is what mattered to him – working hard on his footballing talent.

It is not the education that other people say you have to do that matters. It is not the business that other people point for you that matters. It is what you feel inside about yourself that makes a difference. What you have passion for is easy to achieve. When you have passion for a dream, you withstand all back-pulling factors.


Take time to understand the best of yourself and polish it. That is what matters. It sounds very much unthinkable as one leadership and motivational guru observed that you spend so much time with other people. You spend so much time to make people like you. You know other people more than you know yourself. You have studied them. You know about them, you want to hang out like them. You just want to be like them and you have invested so much time in them, yet you do not know who you are. I challenge you to spend time by yourself.

Les Brown gives us a greater lesson when he says: “It is time you look within yourself and decide that I am in charge of my destiny.”

Become the best at mastering yourself. Start seeing your unique capabilities and endeavour to perfectify yourself. No one else can but you. It is very important for you to believe that you are the one. As a human, you were born special, you have greatness within you and you are phenomenal.

When you realise what you are and start working towards achieving that, life begins to have a special meaning.

One leadership icon once said: “When you become the right person, what you do separates you from other people. You begin to have a sole uniqueness.”

The biggest lesson of all is very simple – as long as you follow other people, as long as you are a copycat, know that you will never be the best copycat in the world. To be the best you can be, then define your value. What you are matters most and it is that that can makes a difference in life. Break the records. Be unique. Be the best there can ever be. Those that break records are those that deny living in the shadows of others. They create a new path for themselves.

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